Nations Editors Abdicate Duty To Snooki

THE LEEK
(an Onion parody)
Dateline: New York

In case you were confused as to how our esteemed leader could know the names of notable cultural institutions like Jay-Z but feign ignorance when asked about Snooki on The View, we now have more insight. This weeks premiere of The Jersey Shore began with Snooki packing up for a reunion with her Guido pals in Miami, she tells the camera "I am bringing tons of bronzer with me since I am no longer going to tanning salons. I ain't going since Obama started to tax them. Of course he doesn't have to tan, just look at him".

Bravo Snookster, the only person (outside of a few well written blogs) to mention the tanning tax and its implied racist overtones. When asked for comment, editors of our countries newspapers started staring at their shoes and mumbled something before running away to hide their heads in the soil of the nearest office plant.

Tax On Tanning Beds

This news item caught my eye today, it's an outrage if you ask me.

But if the health-care reform package currently in Congress passes, you'll be paying a 10 percent tax at your neighborhood tanning salon.
The tax would apply to all indoor tanning services. It's designed to help pay for reforms to expand health-care coverage.
The "tanning tax" replaces a proposed 5 percent tax on cosmetic surgery procedures that had been in the bill.

RACISM!
If you tax tanning services then shouldn't you also tax du rags and malt liqour?